Sometimes People Turn Your Day Around

Two of my roommates and a friend at a pool party

Two of my roommates and a friend at a pool party

Today was miserable. I woke up late which made me late. Plus the bus left early which put me onto a ride with people fighting loudly. Tomorrow I am waking up at 3:30 or earlier for work, I got in trouble (big trouble) for running late, I was not able to go grocery shopping or pick up my packages like I had wanted, lots of my laundry is dirty since I have few sets of clothing….the list of complaints about today could go on and on. It is the first day down here that I really disliked.

However, my lovely roommates came to the rescue. One helped me carry all of my belongings to the apartment. Then the rest made me supper while I showered with a borrowed towel (mine is dirty). Now, I feel much better if still exhuasted and sadder than previously. I just hope that I can do a good job here. What if I am not cut out for this job or just not good enough? That fear keeps replaying through my head.

Whatever the case, I am glad to be here now. I must keep doing my best. There is nothing else I can do, right?

Depression – Real. Talk.


People sometimes ask me what depression sounds like or seem confused about how mental illness feels. Here is a great example of what the voice in your head constantly says. The sad thing is that you begin to think it is the only thing that will be there for you always.

Originally posted on surviving the specter:


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Earning My Ears

My mouse ears and name tag from the Disney College Program

My mouse ears and name tag from the Disney College Program

In Disney, we have lots of code words for things. “Earning my ears” means that this person is training. That is a cute, magical way to look at it, right?

This training is draining but good. I look forward to growing through this experience. Change is scary though. I do not want to become someone who is a totally different woman. Getting drunk, swearing, watching R-rated films – those are not who I want to be. Yet, I need to realize where I am holding myself back instead of allowing growth.

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Listaliciousness: Peter Pan Wisdom, Fixer Upper, and New Vocabulary

Me with Mickey Mouse at Disney

Me with Mickey Mouse at Disney

Today held an adventure at Animal Kingdom as well as Mass and Once Upon a Time with my roommates. I am so very tired but happy. Tomorrow will be a very early start which makes me nervous. However, I am thrilled for my first day of training.

Anyway, here is my post with the top ten links. Enjoy!

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Coping Skills: #83. Virtual Shopping

Japanese Money Tree

Money trees in the Japanese part of the World Showcase that I thought would be fun to get for Mario or another member of my family

Going to Epcot for the first time was wonderful. My lovely roommate Emily took me through the World Showcase. We wandered through shops, bought Disney pins to begin my collection, and oohed over wonderful souvenirs from around the world. I lapped up gelato from Italy, feasted on falafel wraps from Morocco, and wiped away patriotic tears at the end of the American show.

However, one problem that I had throughout the day was wanting to stop and buy things for my family, friends, or myself. There were Mexican treats for my sister Christine, French perfume for my sister Maria, a Chinese money tree for Mario, a huge German beer stein for my dad, Moroccan Turkish Delight from my friend Dawson, Japanese Anime for my coworker Katala,  German Santa Clause ornaments for my Aunt Mary and so much more.

That is not even starting to list all of the items that I longed for to use myself. Continuously, I stopped to ogle an item and thought, “I can come back later. I have over eight more months still.”

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Living with Compassion

If someone were to ask me what one of the most important traits to have is, I would probably answer “compassion.” When you are compassionate, you are willing to sympathize and try to understand another person before judging them.

Also, compassion allows you to feel for his or her pain as well as joy. Think of the word: “com” which is also in community and is a Latin root for “together” linked to the Latin root “pati” which means “to suffer.” When you are compassionate with someone, you are suffering together.

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One Thousand Thanks: 1077 – 1087. Disney College Program Week One

Palm trees

Palm trees near my room

Starting again with Thankfulness Thursday, I am excited to go over my last week and the wonderful moments of being at Disney. Although there have been difficult moments, most of the program has been wonderful. Plus, I am in the happiest place on earth which is certainly something to celebrate.

1077. Awesome roommates – The five girls that I am with are so lovely, kind, funny, and helpful. They are all such blessings to have as roommates and friends.

1078. Warm weather – Being in the 90’s and 80’s is strange but lovely. Sure, it is a bit much at time, but I love it for the most part. Continue reading

Silencing Suicidal Urges

Disney figures

Figures in the Disney Casting House

Today at orientation, I learned that one of the main safety rules that will get you sent home right away is threatening harm. That means you cannot only threaten to harm others but also yourself. No joking or talking about hurting yourself unless you want to be sent home.

Now, this rule seems reasonable for many people. Suicide and self-harm should not be joked about even with close friends. Also not knowing if a roommate or coworker is going to hurt himself or herself is scary. In that way, this rule is wonderful.

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Facing My Fear with Friends

Lanterns at the resort

Lanterns at the resort

Tonight, my roommates and I went to go watch “Dreams” from a resort. Across the water, the fireworks exploded over Cinderella’s castle. Our toes wiggled in the soft sand as we gasped over the gorgeous light-show.

This was the first time that I watched fireworks willingly in years. Just ask my parents. The sound and flashes overwhelmed me. Being an Aspie is certainly not easy especially around the Fourth of July.

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First Day at Disney

Getting lost on the bus system, lugging huge bags of groceries through the sweltering Florida sun, interacting with students from Norway, and laughing with my new roommates – today was a successful, if long, first day at Disney World.

Everything here does seem a bit more magical from the costumes and outfits that fellow classmates are wearing to the palm trees strung with Christmas lights. I cannot wait to start exploring the Disney parks and learning more about them. This trip is the beginning of something very special.

I wish that I could upload pictures or say more. Right now, the internet is not really working. Thus, this blog is a bit shorter. However, I look forward to sharing more with you in the future.