Sorry that this post is later than usual. This morning, I went out on errands and a date with my mother. During our time together, I had the opportunity to be humbled. Although it was uncomfortable, I took this chance and was greatly blessed.
When I think about being humbled, I usually assume that I have embarrassed myself somehow or made a mistake. Many people think about this emotion with dread. After all, no one wants to look like a fool or mess up. I know that I have gone out of my way before so as not to be humiliated in front of others. People tell lies, spend money, even commit crimes to make sure that their pride stays in tact.
However, humility does not always have to be a painful experience. It can be eye-opening and healing. Being reminded that we are only human, no better or worse than anyone else, is a difficult but important life lesson. After all, if no one experienced humility, people would have huge egos and never compromise or work with others. Instead, we need to be knocked down a few times before we realize that we cannot rely solely on ourselves. Alone we will fall and crumble eventually. By looking outside of ourselves and asking for help, we are able to bond with others and accomplish great things.
All of us experience humility in different ways. Some people feel it when others laugh at them while others fear not being in the spotlight. Personally, I realize that I am human when I have to do ordinary human functions such as eating. Although I wish to escape my body, I still have one that needs to be taken care of. Also, being served by others reminds me that I too need others to survive. I am not on this world alone. Fear of being seen as greedy or lazy fills me when someone tries to help me. Thus, I know that I need to keep working on being more humble in this way.
This morning, I was humbled in a very unique way. For the first time ever, I had a pedicure. As I sat by my mother and watched the kind woman wash my feet, I struggled to not apologize. How dare I sit there while she cleaned off my filth? Part of me wanted to run away. At least I could hide my face so no one would see what a brat I was being. Who was I to expected this treatment?
Somehow, I remained seated and had my nails beautifully painted. The experience as a whole was wonderful but uncomfortably humiliating. But I know that it was good for me. Just because I feel worthless does not make me worthless. Just because I think I can do everything alone does not mean that I indeed can. Today reminded me that I need others and to allow myself to be humbled. And this wonderful lesson came along with beautiful toenails! Maybe one day I will let myself experience this again.