Lies That We Believe About Ourselves

Over the years, we begin to believe many things.  Some of these concern the world while others apply only to ourselves.  Everyone has different ones as well as similar ones.  These are part of what make us unique as people.

Normally, we should have a blend of negative and positive.  For example, a man might note that his feet smell like rotten eggs.  However he also believes that he is a great leader.  Another woman might consider herself lacking in math skills but a speed reader.  Having beliefs about ourselves is a good thing because it helps us to understand ourselves better.

Yet, many people with mental illness struggle not to be overly negative in their self beliefs.  For years, these hateful things that I held as “truth” haunted me.  Instead of viewing myself in a honest light, I only saw my weaknesses.  Pretty soon, my flaws grew into blemishes that damaged me as a human and turned me into a monster.

Through treatment, I have begun to debunk my overly-negative beliefs.  My flaws remain but they do not define me alone.  Slowly, the positive aspects of my personality are becoming part of what I believe about myself.

Many people who I have met through treatment have experienced trouble with similar degrading beliefs about themselves.  Thus, I decided to share a wonderful little video and then write some of the past lies I believed.  Each lie will be followed by the truth.  Although I still struggle to take these truths to heart, each day is a new chance for me to be willing to see myself in a different, more positive light.  If you struggle with believing lies, I encourage you to write a similar list.

  1. I am an inhuman monster.  Actually, science can easily prove that I am a human being like every other person.  Sometimes I feel like a monster but that does not make me one.
  2. I am a fat gluttony who does not deserve food.  Every person deserves food and nutrition.  According to my dietitian, my weight is not over.  Although I used to struggle with overeating and weight, I have not binged for over three years.
  3. I am ugly.  Beauty can be found in every person and that includes me (see number one).
  4. I am unlovable.  Men will always spurn me or try to hurt me because they hate me so much.  People who are my friends only do so because of pity or to eventually reject me as a joke.  I cannot decide if others will love me or not.  Other people have claimed to love me.  They have never lied to me before so why would they lie to me now?
  5. I deserve anything bad that happens to me.  Although I make many mistakes, I do not deserve evil.  No person deserves that.
  6. I am broken and damaged because of my past.  People should use me because that is all that I am good for in life.  Yes, many difficult things have hurt me.  However, I have the potential for a hopeful future.  No person, not even me, deserves to be used by others.  There is more that I am good for in life even if I do not see it at this time.
  7. I have no social skills.  Social situations are difficult for me.  However, I have learned social skills over the years.
  8. I have no talents.  Everyone has some talents.  Am I the best artist, writer, actress, or student in the world?  No but that does not make me untalented.
  9. I cannot do anything right.  Once again, I do make mistakes.  However, no one messes everything up.  There are some things that I do right while I do other things wrong.
  10. I am not hard enough on myself.  Um, this one might seem silly considering all that I do to harm and push myself.  However it is still prevalent in my mind.  Reading this list helps me to see the folly of the last belief.

6 thoughts on “Lies That We Believe About Ourselves

  1. ashokbhatia says:

    Yes, our thoughts impact us in so many ways and thoughts arise from our belief systems. Once we have given it a positive hue, other things are likely to fall in place. Great post!

  2. I have many of those thoughts myself, all the time. It is hard to change your thought process when you’ve been trained to think a certain way about yourself!

  3. 80smetalman says:

    The trick is not to take the negative thoughts on board. I know it is easier said than done, it took me a year and a half of counselling to achieve this. But none of the negative things you listed seem to apply to you.

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