It’s Not a Big Deal…Or Is It?

It's Not You, It's My PTSD

Memories haunt, words remind, fears remain, but I will survive.

When people warned me that he wasn’t a good friend, I just smiled sheepishly and shrugged. Sure, he was not perfect. Yet, a quirky, introverted, socially-anxious preteen girl took the friends she could get. So, I told myself repeatedly, “It’s not a big deal.”

It’s not a big deal if he tells me to shut up. I do talk too much.

It’s not a big deal if he belittles my dreams. They won’t come true anyway.

It’s not a big deal if he slaps my face. It was a gentle hit to keep me from being too weird.

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Starting the Morning Strong

Staying strong and focused on recovery is extremely difficult. Whether you have depression, alcoholism, or bipolar disorder, finding hope to keep fighting for a healthy life is wearying at times. Many days, your strength seems to fail, and relapse seems like the only option.

However, there is hope and possibility for change. One huge advocate for that has been Demi Lovato. Reading her book of daily inspirations or meditations has helped me to center myself and begin my days on a strong note.

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Listaliciousness: Women Bullies, Surprise Engagements, and Facing Phobias

Holding a cat at the pet store

Holding a cat at the pet store

Huge announcement: Big Hero 6 is an awesome film. I laughed so hard, more than at any movie I can recently remember. Tears also came to my eyes at certain moment. I guessed a few of the plot twists but was surprised by other parts. If you want to see a great film that any age can enjoy, check this one out.

Anyway, here are some more links to get your week started or finish your weekend. One is political which might seem strange especially since I am afraid of politics or offending people. However, the story is interesting no matter what party you support. Other links have to do with eating disorder and other mental health issues as well as some fun events concerning television and movies. Hopefully you will enjoy them.

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Listaliciousness: Orthodox Reblogging, Disney Secret Rules, and Kid Movies for Parents Like

Petting kitty

Here I am holding a kitten at the pet store on Friday.

My brain is befuddled. Work, work and school – that was mostly my weekend. Add in some crazy drama, moments of wanting to burst into tears and nearly erupting with joy to make the two days utterly draining emotionally, psychically, and mentally.

Anyway, here are some great links from the past week. Choosing them was rather fun because I got a bit more time to look at things online and be inspired. Don’t ask me where that times came from because I am not sure. Hm…Life is confusing.

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Listaliciousness: Afternoon Tea, The Positives of Flunking Exams, and Harry Potter Comics

Tolkien books

Tolkien books

Yesterday was thrilling at points. It was lovely outside, I went in a short hot air balloon, and Mario told me about the new garage opener. Seeing my family, if only for a few hours, was lovely as well.

Anyway, here is a list of links for you. As the previous weeks, they are diverse in topic and type. Hopefully you will find a few that you enjoy.

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Everyone Struggles Even Bullies

Last night, my co-worker and I were discussing how her ten-year-old son is being bullied at school. Hearing about such young children with great sensitivity being treated unkindly brings back horrible memories. I am thankful to my parents for homeschooling me because my experience with teasing could have been much worse. Still, the cruel way that some kids treat others breaks my heart.

One of the hardest parts is that many of those bullies are suffering too. Few kids are mean naturally, in my experience. Some are hurt by their parents while others have been teased themselves and are trying to protect themselves. One child might have a behavioral disorder and another is struggling to understand with a sibling died. Whatever the case, bullying others is still wrong. Yet, realizing the pain of even the unkindest of people is important.  This video really touched me and validated my views.

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The Asperigian Struggle of Attaching and Disattaching From Others

Who Will Love Me

The biggest disease this day and age is that of people feeling unloved. – Princess Diana

It is hard to get into or out of relationship. Most people seem to struggle with this. Change sneaks up and surprises us in wonderful or heart-wrenching ways. Switches in interactions friendships, family members, or romantic relationships can be some of the most difficult but healthy changes we have in life.

People with aspergers have even more difficulty with change than most people. Trouble with social skills and rigidity in thinking led to confusion and great discomfort when others change their behavior or want to have a new type of relationship. After allowing someone into your world and trusting them, you trust that it will stay that way. The harsh truth is that others will change bringing difficulty and the need to adapt.

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Going to See My Hero, Demi Lovato

Posing with Demi's guitar

Posing with Demi’s guitar

On Tuesday, my wonderful friend Taylor took me to the Demi Lovato Neon Lights Tour. It was honestly one of the best experiences of my life. Although noise bothers me, my overwhelmed senses and ringing ears were worth seeing one of my heroes.

Overall, the concert was amazing. My friend won backstage passes. We went around to see the people who worked behind the scenes. My group of people became the first ever to take a picture with Demi’s guitar. Not only was that exciting, it also brought me so much hope. All of the people we met were so kind and friendly. Instead of judging us or acting like we were a problem, they welcomed us in like long-lost friends or family. Plus, the fact that the event was first of all a somber and clean tour made Demi even cooler. She really inspired me as did her choice of people to work with every day.

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Recovery in Media: #5. Jerk California

Recovery in Media: #5. Jerk California

A story of self-discovery and hope as a young man with Tourette syndrome uncovers his past and prepares for his future.

5. Jerk California by Jonathan Friesen

When I first started  college, this book was suggested to me be the head of the disabilities office.  He figured that with my love of reading and understanding of different disorders, I would enjoy this book.  A few months later, the author Jonathan Friesen came to speak at our college.  This was a wonderful and inspiring experience.  There I bought a book and had him sign it for me. Now, I can pick up this novel when I feel abandoned, misunderstood, or worthless.

Synopsis:  An outcast at school and home, Sam Carrier struggles each day with his Tourette syndrome.  Longing to have a normal life and be with Naomi, the girl of his dreams, he tries to fit in but always is pushed away.  When his only friend, an older man named George, dies, Sam gains the courage to go on a trip to discover the truth about himself and his father.  Along the way, he gains insight into his past, hope for the future, and strong relationships that last.

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