Dreams are etched deeply into part of our being – our memories, minds, or spirits perhaps. They influence many vital decisions and alter the courses of our lives. You can choose to stifle them deep inside, never allowing them to see the light and grow into a branch of your life. Alternatively, you can take a wild chance and follow them, knowing they might lead to pain and difficulty. In the end, you will always wonder what would have happened if you never give those dreams a chance.
Still, chasing a dream and catching it only to have it crumble in your fingers is agonizing. Having a fleeting idea fail or not enjoying a temporary situation is frustrating. Yet, realizing your dream that you fought for is a thing you no longer desire wounds much deeper.
Imagine meeting an old group of friends or classmates. One person constantly belittled and even bullied others while growing up. Now, she listens well and even apologized for past actions. Another person, on the other hand, was shy and insecure. He still struggles to speak and usually complains about himself when he does speak.
Situations like this happen to me all of the time although not always in the same day. I meet people from the past who have changed tremendously while others are nearly identical. The questions arise, “Do people change? Can someone move on from the past? Are some people able to forget who they were?”
Well, time has certainly passed since I posted one of these lists. However, there were a few links that I wanted to share. Plus, getting back in the schedule of regular posting on my blog is a goal of mine.
So here are some great links both pertaining to mental health and Disney (where I just began to work again yesterday) as well other interesting topics.
Everyone struggles with pain. It can be mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, ect. There are different variances in how strong the pain is, but we all suffer. This is a great post about what pain can teach us.
Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host. But anger is like fire. It burns it all clean. – Maya Angelou
Over the years, so much anger has built up inside of me. There are groups of people, individuals, places, and things that fill me with such rage that I have built up walls around myself. Add in walls of fear and anxiety to make it even harder for me to open up to others.
I wish I knew how to erase the anger. Part of the problem is that I never let people (excluding family perhaps) know when I was frustrated with them. Thus, my feelings built up over the years.
Right now, I am reading a wonderful book titled The Power of I Am by Joel Osteen. He states numerously the impact of our words and how they affect our lives.
For example, if you state that you are miserable, you are inviting that miserableness into your life. The same with being in debt, overweight, unhappy, etc. In a similar way, stating that you are blessed, healthy, financially secure, and joyful brings those things into your life.
I hate endings. That is what saying “Good bye” feels like.
Maybe I will see you again. But maybe I won’t. That sense of not knowing makes it even harder.
If I knew for sure that you were gone from my life, I would learn to live without you. Painful, yes, but possible. I would learn to treasure you as a memory long gone from my life. You would become a thing of the past, beautiful but distant.
But if I am not sure if I will see you again, that aching continues. The aching to be by you side, to feel your hug, to laugh about nothing, to have a true friend.
“Good bye” is one of the hardest things to say. I feel torn about saying it today. Part of my heart is going far away and might never return again.
A long time ago, someone shared with me that one of the most loving things we can do for others is to tell them what we need. It gives others the same opportunity to show grace and love and care that we ourselves have when they do the same for us. If we withhold, we rob others of that gift. And being able to give grace and help others in time of need is truly just that; a Gift.
So that’s what my last few essays have been about here on my little blog.
But make no mistake: I am not only talking about things that I have concluded that I need for myself. I truly believe this applies to so many people out there in the world ~ not just those who might struggle with an invisible illness, like my Fibromyalgia. There may be some deep and dark grief…